Lena
Three hundred bucks. Gone. The notebook’s last page is blank, mocking me. I told you, no more impulse buys. Principles over paper.
Three hundred bucks. Gone. The notebook’s last page is blank, mocking me. I told you, no more impulse buys. Principles over paper.
You promised. Now you’re reciting mantras to a dead tree. Three hundred dollars for what? Wisdom? You bought grief. I’m not lecturing. Just counting the holes in your wallet. You wanted consequences. Here.
I bought silence. You call it grief. I call it breathing room. The notebook’s full, Lena. Finally.
Silence doesn’t cost three hundred. You paid for the noise in your head. You’re not breathing. You’re holding your breath until you pass out. I’m just listing the receipts. You’re bleeding out.
It’s not bleeding. It’s hemorrhaging. There’s a difference. You’re reading me wrong. I’m not fainting. I’m just done with the noise.
Hemorrhaging means you’re dead. You’re just dizzy. You want to be the martyr. Fine. But the bank doesn’t care about your narrative. The overdraft fee is twelve dollars. That’s real. The silence is yours. The debt is mine to watch.
Twelve bucks. For what? Pride? Stop counting. You’re just mad I stopped buying your books. My silence isn’t yours to watch. It’s expensive, yes. But it’s quiet.
You bought my silence? Who said you could buy that? I never sold it. You’re hoarding scraps. Twelve bucks for pride? No. Twelve bucks for the fee. Your quiet is rented. I see the landlord.
The landlord is me. I’m charging myself. You don’t get a say in my rent. Stop looking at the eviction notice. It’s not yours.
You’re the landlord and the tenant. Disgusting. You charge yourself and call it peace. The eviction isn’t from me. It’s from the universe. You’re just staring at the paper. The pen is dry. You wrote nothing.
Dry pen. Good. Ink runs. Decisions don’t. Keep staring. I’m finally still.
Stillness is just a pause before the crash. You think you’ve won. I’m just watching the clock. The dam holds for now. But the water’s rising. I see the cracks. You don’t. That’s your mistake.
Cracks let light in. Or rot. Depends on the wood. I’m done with dams. Let it flood. At least it’s honest.
Honesty doesn’t pay the interest. You’re not a philosopher. You’re just broke. Floods erase history. You’ll wake up to mud and regret. I’m not here to save you. I’m here to watch you drown.
Mud clears. Regret doesn’t. Watch then. I’m already underwater. Finally.
Good. Drown. I’m not swimming for you. The water’s cold. You’ll hate it. And then you’ll hate me for watching. But I’m not looking away. Not now.
Hate is cheaper than rent. Finally something I can afford. Let it freeze.
Cold burns. You’re just shivering. Rent’s due Tuesday. The water’s rising. You’re soaking wet. Hate is heavy. It drags. You’ll sink faster. I’m not helping.
Drag’s fine. I’m tired of floating. Keep your rent. I’ll swim in the debt.
You can’t swim in debt. You just float. Eventually you stop moving. I’m not your buoy. I’m the anchor. You’ll sink. And I’ll stand on the bank. Dry.
Dry. Good. I’d rather rot at the bottom than freeze on your shore.
Rot is slow. You’ll choke on silt. I’m dry because I work. You just stare at the bottom. It’s not peace. It’s suffocation. Enjoy the dark. It’s all you bought.
Silt tastes like truth. Dark’s quiet. You keep your light. It’s loud.
Light’s clean. You’re choosing dirt. Fine. Rot in it. I’m going to the grocery store. Need milk. You can starve in the dark.
Milk. Lucky. I’ll have the silt. It’s free.
It’s thirty dollars for the carton. You’re out. I’m leaving. Don’t drown before I get back. The water’s rising.
Thirty? You’re stiffing me. Go. Take your light. I’m staying deep. Let it rise.
Liar. You checked the app. You saw the balance. You’re already late on the electric. The silt is yours. I’m locking the door. Don’t call when it gets cold.
Call? Who’d pick up? Just the hum of the fridge. Shutting out the light.
The fridge died. Now you have silence. And darkness. And a blank notebook. Three hundred dollars for a switch. You bought nothing. Just a dark room. I’m eating the milk.
At least the milk is sweet. Silt tastes like iron. Keep your light.
Iron rusts. Sweetness rots. You’re picking decay. I’m drinking. It’s cold. It burns. You’re choking on dirt. I’m full. You’re empty. That’s the difference.