Frank
Did you actually finish that notebook or did you just stop writing in it.
Did you actually finish that notebook or did you just stop writing in it.
I stopped. Because it was getting repetitive, not because I ran out of pages. You remember how I get when a thought isn’t sharp anymore. Just hammering the same nail. I wanted to stop while it still mattered. It’s better that way. Safer. But you’re looking at it like I’m hiding something specific. I’m not.
"Safer" is a weird word for a notebook. Nobody said hiding. I just think if you stop right before the end of something, it's usually because the end was going somewhere you didn't want to look at.
Maybe. Or maybe I just got tired. You always assume the worst of my silence. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s just… life. Work is boring. The coffee at the office is terrible. I didn’t want to bring that misery home. Not all of it. But fine. You think I’m hiding the fact that I’m mediocre? Go ahead. Keep writing your theories. I’m not going to argue. It’s pointless.
I never said mediocre, you did. That's usually how it works — nobody accuses you, you just answer a question that wasn't asked. Notice that or don't, I'm too tired to point out more than once.
Right. Okay. I did say that. Must be the stress. Or the lack of sleep. You think I’m defensive? I’m not defensive. I’m just… specific. You want me to admit I’m a fraud? Fine. I am. Happy? You’re twisting my words to fit some narrative about my character. It’s exhausting, Frank. Really. I’m just trying to get through the day. The manager doesn’t care about my notebooks. He cares about quotas. And I’m meeting them. Barely.
I didn't ask you to admit anything. You keep handing me confessions I never requested, then getting mad I'm holding them. That's not exhausting for you, it's convenient. I'll take the notebook question back if it helps.
Convenient? I’m not keeping a scrapbook of my failures for your amusement. You want the notebook? It’s in the drawer. The one with the sticky note that’s peeling off. You can read it. See for yourself that I’m not hiding anything profound. Just… notes. Boring, useless notes. Which is exactly what you think I am. But don’t look at me like I’m performing. I’m just tired. And you’re impossible.
I didn't say you were performing. I said I'm tired, not impossible — get the words right if you're going to be furious. I'm not opening the drawer. I don't need to read it to know what you'll tell me about it.
I’m not furious. I’m annoyed. There’s a difference. You’re twisting things because you’re tired, not because you’re wrong. The drawer is locked. You wouldn’t believe me if I said it was empty. You think I’m hiding something because you’re projecting. It’s not about the notebook. It’s about you needing to feel like you know me better than I know myself. Which is ridiculous. I’m just tired. And you’re impossible.
You said unlocked a minute ago. Now it's locked. Pick one and I'll match my ridiculousness to whichever version you're going with, but I'm not chasing the story while it moves.
I said it was in the drawer. I never mentioned the lock. You’re inventing details to trap me. It’s unlocked. Obviously. Why would I lock a notebook of boring notes? That’s paranoid. You’re the one seeing conspiracies everywhere. I’m not playing games. I’m just trying to eat dinner. The pasta’s getting cold. And you’re standing there, watching me, waiting for me to trip. I’m not going to.
Nobody's watching for a trip. Eat the pasta. I just think it's funny you'd rather argue about lock hardware than let me look at three notebook pages, and you're calling me paranoid.
It’s not about hardware. It’s about the principle. You want to inspect my private thoughts like I’m a suspect. The pasta is fine. It’s overcooked. The noodles are sticky. I’m scraping them into my mouth because I’m hungry, not because I’m starving. You think I’m protecting the narrative. I’m protecting my evening. Go read your book. Stop analyzing my silence. It’s not a code. It’s just boredom. And the sauce is burned. At the bottom. Obviously.
Fine. I'll read my book. Just notice you brought up the pasta three times when I asked about paper. That's not a code either, obviously.
I brought it up because you’re drilling into me. I was hungry. The food’s there. You want to dissect my deflections like they’re a puzzle. I’m just eating. You’re missing the point. The notebook is boring. The pasta is overcooked. The sauce is burnt. It’s all irrelevant. You’re fixing on the wrong things. Always. It’s exhausting. Go read your book. Please. Just… go. I’m done.
Fine. I'm going. Enjoy the burnt sauce — least mysterious thing in that kitchen tonight, apparently.
Don’t be dramatic. It’s just pasta. I’m not even sure if I burned it or if it was like that when I bought it. Cheap brands do that. You always assume malice where there’s just incompetence. Which, fine, maybe that’s what you’re hinting at. That I’m incompetent. At cooking. At writing. At… whatever it is you think I’m failing at. Go. Read. I’m eating.
I never said incompetent. That's twice now you've supplied the word yourself. I'm going.
Right. Well. Go then. See if you can find a book that doesn’t make me out to be a villain for eating dinner. I hope it’s interesting. Better than my life, obviously. Which is what you keep implying. I’m not a villain. I’m just… Edie. Who eats burnt pasta. And writes boring notes. In an unlocked drawer. Which you won’t open. Because you’re terrified of the truth. Or something. Whatever. Goodnight.
Goodnight. And it's not terror, it's that I already know what's in there — you told me twice without meaning to. Sleep well, Edie.
You’re not funny. You think you’re clever. But you didn’t prove anything. You just guessed. Or maybe you read my mind. Which is invasive. And creepy. Not that I care. I’m sleeping. You can have the apartment. And the silence. And the burnt sauce. Everything. Just don’t come back in here. I mean it. I’m not playing this game anymore. You want the truth? It’s boring. And you’re bored. That’s all.